Exactly. If you want to eat out, we all know what to do to be cautious, but you’re unfortunately rolling the dice every time.
My friends who work in restaurants have said they know if an allergy is “real” based on how polite the customer is.
Like, whenever possible I call or email nicer restaurants in advance to let them know I have a wheat allergy and ask if they can make some recommendations/help me come up w a “safe” order, and then remind them when I come in/let them know I discussed it w the manager and they said xyz dish can be made safely. Multiple restaurants have said they appreciate the advance notice rather than springing it on them during a busy dinner rush.